Are You in Denial About Your Weight?

In the past few weeks, I’ve been on a new fitness plan and I’m more interested in articles about nutrition and fitness.  A recent New York Times piece, Are Most People in Denial About Their Weight? really caught my attention because it seemed to speak directly to me.

Given the ever-increasing obesity problem in the U.S., researchers have done many studies on the topic of weight.  Their findings don’t shock me.  “Because our bodies change over time, the brain must constantly adjust its perception. Scientists believe that this internal calibration system can sometimes go haywire, notably for sufferers of anorexia, bulimia and body dysmorphic disorder, and possibly for obese people too.”

A Duke Univeristy study found that 1 in 4 overweight or obese people don’t believe they have a problem.  Dr. Gary Bennett focuses his work on preventing obesity and said, “It’s often said that the first step in improving a problem is believing that you have one. That’s particularly true for obesity.”

Have you ever been shocked by your appearance in a photo?  Perhaps that has motivated your to start your own fitness and diet regimen.  I finally came to the realization that my clothes weren’t shrinking, each photo couldn’t be taken from a bad angle and my thyroid condition wasn’t to blame for everything. Once I got serious about making a change, I dusted off my Insanity DVDs and began the ambitious 60-day workout challenge.  Three weeks into the program I began to really enjoy the intense cardio workouts, but realized exercise wasn’t enough and started to change my eating habits.

I had always balked at the the idea of keeping a food journal because it seemed way too time consuming and unnecessary, but even taking a much more critical look at everything I ate seemed to provide a serious benefit.  While making breakfast for my children, I’d often eat the remaining half bagel my youngest daughter didn’t finish and when my son ate all but the last third of his sausage, egg and cheese biscuit, I’d just finish that too as part of my cleaning up routine.  Now I realize that doesn’t sound like a lot, but then consider the rest of the day.  Preparing their lunches for school, I’d eat a handful of grapes as I was putting it in their lunch bags.  Since several of the Oreo cookies were broken, I’d normally eat those too instead of including them in the lunches.  How many calories had I consumed before 7:30 am and before I even technically ate breakfast? This morning examination was eye-opening for me.  Mindless eating is a big part of my problem, but I’m no longer in denial.

Now I am eating mindfully.  I’m doing a low carb diet, have cut out most sugar and I’m counting my calories.  This is not exactly fun.  In fact, it’s downright difficult.  I know it’ll be worth it, however.

Have you ever been in denial about your weight?  What motivated you to change?  How did you do it?  What helped you the most?

Is Stay at Home Parenting a Career?

The recent controversy surrounding a statement made by democratic strategist Hilary Rosen on CNN last night regarding Ann Romney’s lack of work experience reignited a discussion about a current issue and enduring questions.  Ann Romney responded to Rosen’s comment that “she never worked a day in her life” on Twitter.  She wrote, “I made a choice to stay home and raise five boys. Believe me, it was hard work.” This exchange may have begun in a political campaign setting, but the questions raised are not limited to a specific party, demographic, race or gender.

Is stay at home parenting really work?  Can it be considered a career choice?

This is an issue with which I am most personally familiar and I’ve asked myself these questions numerous times.  As a mother of three, I spend the majority of my time caring for my family.  I am also a part time college instructor, freelance writer and host an active Facebook discussion page.  Each year as tax day arrives, I am painfully reminded that most of my work does not pay.  This fact makes me feel inadequate in many ways.  Our society places a huge emphasis on monetary contributions.  Money is evidence of work.  What happens then if the bulk of your work is unpaid?

There is tremendous value in stay at home parenting and it is absolutely work.  Children and the parents benefit from it, but the sacrifice is also huge.  I entered into this with my eyes wide open and waited to have children until my early thirties.  When I became pregnant, I researched daycares and contemplated going back to my full time faculty position.  But I knew I always wanted to be a stay at home mother, so I carefully considered ways to keep myself engaged in the work I love while being able to be at home.  My education and work experience helped afford me opportunities to teach part time in the evenings and online while accepting occasional writing projects to supplement daily parenting life.  This provides me with a way to contribute to our family monetarily and it also gives me some much appreciated intellectual stimulation. The choice to stay home is not one available to all parents and I am grateful that I have the opportunity to do so.  Despite the difficulties and drawbacks, it is my choice and one I continue to think works best for me and my family. I don’t consider it my career, however.  In some ways, using that word seems to cheapen the work in my opinion.

The level of continual self sacrifice it takes to be a stay at home parent is daunting.  It is tough not to be envious of those earning both increasing financial compensation and personal enrichment in their full time careers. The work of a stay at home parent is constant.  There are no evenings off, breaks over the holidays and it can be messy as well as physically and emotionally exhausting.  The joys are tremendous too.  I see all my children’s highs and lows.  I am there to pick them up when there a stomach virus strikes while they are at school and I don’t have to cancel a meeting to do it.  I can and do volunteer in the classroom.  Our family’s schedule is more relaxed than it would be if I worked full time and I appreciate that very much.

One of the reasons I don’t consider stay at home parenting to be a career is that it seems to have a natural expiration date.  I don’t intend to be a stay at home mother forever and as much as I enjoy this time in my life, I look forward to the next chapter when I do pursue full time employment again. When I do go back to work full time, I will have more skills.  In addition to becoming a better teacher and writer, I’ve learned how to be an excellent multitasker and negotiator.  I am more patient too.  That is all because of the work I do as a stay at home mother.

Critical thinkers know that stay at home parenting is a valuable, it is work and we should never marginalize anyone who embraces this job.